The waiting game

I went back to Taichung about 2 weeks ago for my FET. I went back to the hospital on my Day 11 and was given a bunch of meds, PIO injections and Crinone gel that I needed for my FET. This is my very first FET and my second embryo transfer and I was kinda shocked that I still needed that much medicine, in addition to Progesterone that I had to inject through my butt. I didn't want to go to the hospital on a daily basis just for the injections so I forced my husband to do the injecting for me. He was totally terrified at the thought of poking a huge needle into my butt but he really didn't have a choice.

Day 18, I went back to the hospital for the embryo transfer. We were asked to be in the hospital by 8am. I went straight to the injection room for 3 injections then paid for the procedure, which was a total of 50,000NTD. I then had my ultrasound done, and my lining was at 1.0cm which was good. Also had some blood tests done before staying in the VIP room to wait for my turn.

One thing that was totally different from my first embryo transfer in Mackay was there was a massage right before the procedure. It was a short back massage, maybe around 30 minutes long but it was just something I didn't expect. It felt good though and made relax a little.

After the massage, I found myself waiting in the VIP room again. I was called and was led to the operating room. There were a total of 3 women, including myself in the room. I was the last one of the three. It was a little weird that when the procedure started, Chinese-sounding instrumental music was played as Dr. Lee would do each of the transfer. At this point, I must tell you that I only they were only transferring my one and only embryo, which was not the best quality. Dr. Lee told us that he's looking at a 30% chance of pregnancy given the grade of the embryo that we had. Of course, we were sad that we didn't have a better embryo but I am relieved that it has normal chromosomes, based on the PGS they did.

Today is Day 5 post transfer. I sit in my hotel room wondering what God has in store for me. It is also a Sunday and I was able to catch the livestream of CCF's praise and worship today. It's all about Jesus being our shepherd and how we are completely helpless without Him. We have to trust in Him and depend on Him for everything that we do and we are. Whatever happens, I just know that He has a plan for me.

Try and try

I'm turning 34 in a few months and the thought of growing older terrifies me. I'm such a happy-go-lucky person but facing the fact that my eggs have an expiration date really scares me to the core. I want to be able to give my husband a child and I know that it's not too late yet. So I just better get at it and try again. The next cycle is another opportunity to be a mom and I haven't given up yet. I'm back in Manila but I'm going back to Taiwan when I get my period. Hopefully, we get to retrieve more eggs this time around.

5 is the magic number

Had my egg retrieval this morning. I was so excited to find out how many eggs they were able to retrieve. 5. That's it. I'm feeling pretty miserable. It would be pointless to do the PGS on less than 5 embryos and since we're not sure if the 5 that they got will even fertilize, the doctor suggested that we do another IVF cycle next month. Going back to Philippines in 2 days with all my medicine that should last until Day 7, then I have to come back to Taichung for a check up. Been feeling pretty down all day but I know that I shouldn't lose hope. IVF#4 is inevitable I guess.

Egg retrieval

Just had my last glass of water at exactly 9:55PM. No food or water after 10PM so I don't vomit as a side effect of the anesthesia I'll be getting tomorrow for my egg retrieval. This is it. Lord, I trust Your plans and pray for many beautiful eggs to be retrieved tomorrow.😊

Lee Women's Hospital Taichung

So I recently started my IVF cycle and decided to do it in Taichung this time. I started my stims last week and noticed that they're giving me a much higher dosage in comparison to my previous IVFs in Mackay. The first 5 days, I was on 150IU or Gonal-F and 75IU of Menopur. For days 8 and 9 though, Dr. Lee increased my Gonal-F to 225IU and replaced Menopur with Saizen. I've never heard of Saizen before so I googled it and found out that it's used mostly to improve egg quality. This is probably something that I really need! I really hope and pray that my follicles continue to grow!

Dr. Lee also recommended that I do a Preimplantation Genetic Screening, which would be an additional 65,000NTD. This is a lot of money but he says that through this, they can look a lot closer into the embryo and distinguish the normal from the abnormal ones that will probably end in miscarriage. Since I really don't want to have to go through the pain of having another miscarriage, we decided to go with it. I hope everything works out!

A surprise that quickly turned upside down

4 days ago, I randomly took a home pregnancy test and was in shock to find a second faint line. I saw my gynecologist the next day and we did a Serum Beta HCG test and the result was 50. We had stopped trying so we were surprised that we could get pregnant naturally. It could really happen! My doctor asked that I take another Beta HCG test 2 days later. 50 was supposed to double and become at least 100 for it to be considered a possible viable pregnancy.

I got my result today and it went down to 25. My doctor says it's a chemical pregnancy.

This is one of the times when I try hard not to ask 'why?' But I keep on trusting God and His plans for us to become parents someday. It might not happen right this moment but I trust in His perfect timing and believe that though I may not understand why this is happening to me now, I will someday.